the scarlet letter

at letter talaga. the plot thickens.

i've been so antsy lately. it can't be my boracay trip, where i was able to reflect on a whole lot of things. it can't be my son's text message on mom's phone inviting me to their school's christmas party --- as a guest. it can't be this sudden ennui with AM and his nadia-please-understand-me-naman scheduling. it absolutely cannot be an old college-mate popping up in my email inbox and asking me how i've been and genuinely interested in my well-being. and of course it can't be the bizarre phone call i got from this car company, offering me a job in corporate sales.

it was a reckless moment. i'm convinced of it now. i wrote her. penned my thoughts, my apologies, my feelings. it was short and sweet. no, make that short and bittersweet. i signed it with my initials. then floating in a dream, i wrote AM's address on the back of the envelope. i would find a use for his home, after all. such trust, i thought wryly. and such utter control, nadia. such restraint. and then ping! ping! in the elevator to our concierge with the instructions to mail it that very day.

now i have to worry about what to wear to this evening's cocktail with former classmate in gb3. then tomorrow's interview. i'm giddy! wot, is my life shifting plates beneath my feet once more? twice and thrice more? for the nth time!!!